It's Not what you think, or is it?
by Youkolvr
Summary: Because all days should be filled with NaruSaku love, even Sasuke’s birthday! My little attempt at humor. This is a two parter. I hope you enjoy. OOC maybe. AU-ish. R&R Please or just read and enjoy. For V-Day! strong t for perversion.
1. Part I

**It's not what you think or is it?**

"Speech"

'thoughts'

**Disclaimer: **All publicly recognizable Naruto characters, settings, etc. are the property of Masashi Kishimoto and Shueisha Inc. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. I know it isn't Sasuke's birthday but whatever and Sasuke, Sakura, and Naruto are eighteen years old in this fic.

It was a bright and sunny day in Konoha as Uchiha Sasuke stood outside of his annoying female teammate's home. A light breeze ruffled his ebony colored locks that took the form of a duck's behind as he raised a pale hand to knock on the front door.

When no one answered the door, Sasuke figured that perhaps his teammate had slept in once again so he stooped down to retrieve a spare key that Sakura left for her teammates from beneath the welcoming matt. After retrieving the key, Sasuke unlocked the door and replaced the key beneath the atrociously bright yellow welcoming matt and gripped the golden door knob preparing to turn it.

A large hand on his shoulder stopped his movements. "I couldn't find Naruto. Maybe he's in here too." Kakashi's lazy voice filtered in from behind the young Uchiha.

For reasons unknown to Sasuke, his beautiful black eyes narrowed slightly at the thought of his two teammates in this house together and alone and on his birthday no less.

"Well, let's go see what they're up to; shall we?" Kakashi asked smiling knowingly at Sasuke's reaction.

Sasuke snapped out of his reverie and turned the door knob before stepping into the rather spacious house that Sakura lived in alone.

Kakashi followed Sasuke and closed the door behind him with a gentle click.

The duo were about to head for Sakura's bedroom when a clattering noise in the kitchen stopped them. Together, they looked to their left at the large wooden door across the room that led into the kitchen.

"Hey! Naruto! Not so rough! You're going to break it. It's not like you do this all the time!" Sakura's annoyed voice filtered out to Sasuke and Kakashi.

"Mou, Sakura-Chan! It's too tight! I have to be rough with it for the white stuff to come out!" Naruto's whiny voice could be heard responding back.

Sasuke and Kakashi looked at each other; both were thinking the same thing. With a nod to the other; they quickly approached the door to the kitchen and stood with their ears pressed against it to better hear what was happening in the kitchen.

"Pssh! I bet Sasuke-Kun could it to come out without being rough." Sakura challenged.

Sasuke's and Kakashi's eyes both widened in surprise as Sasuke's face turned green.

Naruto snorted and Kakashi and Sasuke heard him grunt "Che, I bet Sasuke's never done this before."

Sakura sighed, "you're right. I'm sure he hasn't. We should ask him to join us next time." She added in a cheey voice "It would be fun with him."

Sasuke choked on the air at that statement.

Naruto grunted again "Sakura-Chan, that was mean." Sasuke and Kakashi could just picture Naruto pouting before he gave a couple of more grunts.

Kakashi pressed his ear tighter to the door as Sasuke nearly broke into spasms beside him.

Sakura groaned, "quit complaining and hurry up will you? Sasuke-kun should be here soon and I want to surprise him."

Sasuke twitched slightly, oh he was surprised alright.

Naruto groaned and grunted "I-it's stuck. I can't get it out!" He panted as though he was making an effort.

"Hold still; I'll get it out!" Sakura commanded.

Sasuke and Kakashi listened with wide eyes as grunts, groans, and pants came from the kitchen.

"Ahh! It came out!" Naruto sighed in relief.

"Eww, I got some in my mouth" Sakura said in disgust.

Naruto snorted, "I thought you said it tasted good before; remember Sakura-Chan? I wonder if Sasuke will like it."

That was the last straw for Sasuke and Kakashi and they flung the door open to reveal Sakura and Naruto standing in front of a large cake with white and blue icing only most of the icing was covering Sakura and Naruto as well as a majority of the kitchen. Naruto was holding a bent spoon with icing on it.

Sakura licked her icing covered lips and smiled brightly at Sasuke. "Happy Birthday, Sasuke-Kun!"

Sasuke's eyes rolled back in his head as he fainted dead on the floor.

Sakura tilted her head to the right, "eh? What's wrong with Sasuke-Kun, Kakashi-Sensei?" She blinked her large green eyes at Kakashi innocently.

Kakashi laughed while internally relieved, "nothing Sakura; he just has a very over active imagination is all." He then stooped down and picked Sasuke up before throwing him onto his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and getting back up. "I'm sure Sasuke will love the cake. See you two later." He waved before disappearing in a cloud of smoke.

Sakura stared at the spot where Kakashi had left with a pout tugging at her lips, her thin pink eye brows were drawn downward slightly. "I wonder what Kakashi-Sensei meant about Sasuke-Kun having a overactive imagination."

Naruto shrugged and ruffled his already wild golden locks. before walking over to Sakura and turning her to face him. "What I wonder is when are you going to call me kun?" He asked, his bright blue eyes searching Sakura's green eyes imploringly.

Sakura grinned mischievously as she dragged the pointer finger of her right hand down the bridge of Naruto's nose getting some icing on it. "I don't know. Maybe I need some persuasion." She replied coyly as she popped her finger into her mouth and licked the icing off of it.

Naruto pulled Sakura's finger out of her mouth and instead covered her mouth with his own in a heated kiss. "Persuasion sounds like it might be fun." Naruto pulled away, sucking lightly on Sakura's lower lip before he let go and licked his own now icing covered lips. "Mmm… you're right. This stuff does taste good, but it tastes better on you." He picked Sakura up bridal style and grabbed a half full container of icing before exiting the room and heading in the direction of Sakura's bedroom.

Sasuke's half iced cake lay abandoned on the kitchen counter all through the night, because all days should be filled with NaruSaku love, even Sasuke's birthday!

**End**

Wow… I hope you enjoyed it. Poor Sasuke. Sasuke's imagination may not be so over imaginative after all! Oh well, maybe like Sakura said; Sasuke can join them next time. The spoon was what was stuck and what Sakura told Naruto not to be so rough with. Now I want a cake! Happy Early Valentine's day Heaven and Earth:, The Naruto X Sakura Fan Club!


	2. Part II

**It's not what you think or is it? Part II**

"Speech"

'thoughts'

**Disclaimer: **All publicly recognizable Naruto characters, settings, etc. are the property of Masashi Kishimoto and Shueisha Inc. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. I know it isn't Sasuke's birthday but whatever and Sasuke, Sakura, and Naruto are eighteen years old in this fic.

Yeah, I decided to make a part two. This is the same night as the first part.

* * *

Yamanaka Ino stood inside her home with the rest of the rookie nine and Guy's team minus Sakura and Naruto of course. "Where's forehead and that idiot Naruto? They should have brought the cake over an hour ago!" She demanded.

Sasuke sat at Ino's dining room table surrounded by presents by everyone close to him, but Sakura and Naruto. He really did not want to be here right now especially since every time he so much as moved a muscle, Ino snapped a picture of him saying he was so cute and adorable with his birthday cone on. Yes. Birthday cone. Ino had forced everyone including Sasuke to wear birthday cones on their heads.

Sasuke didn't mind the fact that there was no cake seeing as he hated sweets anyway, but he was irked at the fact that Sakura and Naruto ,who he hated to admit were the two people he wanted to be with him the most, had failed to show up as promised.

Akimichi Chouji wasn't any happier than Ino at the fact that the cake had failed to show up. He had been looking forward to eating some of the cake. He loved cake, but he wasn't fat! No, no, he was more robust than fat. Or at least that was what his best friend Shikamaru told him.

Hyuga Hinata was not very comfortable with the fact that Naruto was out somewhere alone with Sakura doing who knew what. Immediately a dark blush stained the Hyuga heir's pale cheeks as she directed her wide luminous eyes to the blue carpeted floor.

"Argh! When I see those two idiots, I'll kill them!" Ino growled out as she flipped her long platinum blonde hair over her shoulder and continued to pace.

"Forget the cake. I hate sweets anyway." Sasuke's deep voice stopped Ino's pacing.

Ino spun around to face the last living Uchiha, anger burning brightly in her pale blue orbs. "Forget the cake?! Forget the cake?! Do you know what you are saying Sasuke-Kun?! A birthday isn't a birthday with out a cake!"

Sasuke shrugged, "If it bothers you so much then go down to the market and buy a cake. It would probably taste better than anything the idiot and the annoyance could make." Sasuke was lying through his teeth, but he didn't care as long as it shut Ino up.

Ino continued to glare at Sasuke, "No damn it! They promised they would bake your cake and it isn't here! They chose the wrong night to bail out on us!"

Shikamaru sighed tiredly from Sasuke's right, "If it bothers you so much then why don't you stop being so troublesome and go to Sakura's to see what's wrong?"

Ino glared at her teammate, "No! I will not give them the satisfaction of knowing that they are bugging us! We'll just skip the cake and go straight onto the games. First we'll play seven minutes in heaven and Sasuke-Kun and I go first!" With that said, Ino grabbed Sasuke's wrist and dragged him into a closet.

"Oh Sasuke-Kun! Finally we are alone together without that stupid forehead girl in the way!" Ino's voice echoed from inside the closet.

"Hn" was Sasuke's response.

A loud thump was heard and then heavy breathing. The gang outside of the closet shared skeptical looks.

"Ooh Sasuke-Kun, you're so strong and manly!" Ino's voice cooed.

A grunt came presumably from Sasuke then a zipping sound was heard.

The group outside of the closet minus Neji, Shino, and Shikamaru inched closer to the closet.

"Oh, it's so big!" Ino voiced in astonishment.

"Hn" was all Sasuke said back.

Ino gasped from in the closet. "Oh, it feels weird, I wonder what it tastes like."

"Hn, why don't you try it and see?" Sasuke's voice could be heard with a hint of a smirk.

Outside of the closet there was a heavy thump as Hinata fainted but no one paid any attention as slurping sounds and grunts were heard from inside the closet.

"Mmmph" a suctioning sound was heard, "This taste's really good Sasuke-Kun! Has Forehead tasted it yet?"

Grunt. "Hn. Keep sucking it. No, she hasn't. I was going to make her and the idiot taste it tonight after the party." Another grunt.

Shikamaru was the first to get his wits about him and he opened the closet to revealed Ino leaning against one wall with a lollipop in her mouth and Sasuke leaning against the other wall with a lollipop in his mouth too and one hand in his pocket. "Whamph?" Ino asked innocently the lollipop still in her mouth.

Needless to say everyone, but Ino and Sasuke were surprised. It turned out that the lollipops were something of Sasuke's invention and instead of being sweet ,they were sour. Sasuke had supplied Ino with the lollipop so she wouldn't talk and annoy him. As for the grunts… well it's Sasuke and all he does is grunt and sulk anyway.

* * *

Meanwhile over at Sakura's…

Sakura curled up against Naruto's bare chest a content smile on her face. "I feel like we're forgetting something."

Naruto stretched languidly before he wrapped his right arm around Sakura's petite waist. "I don't know why, but I feel the same way." Suddenly his eyes widened and he turned on the light on the lamp next to the bed before he jumped out of the bed. "I'll be right back!" He raced out of the room and yes, he was naked.

Naruto ran into the kitchen and right past the neglected half iced cake and over to the counter beside the sink. He grabbed a round container and raced back past the cake and to the bedroom.

"Got it!" He called holding up the container of white icing. "I forgot to get more icing!"

Sakura sweat dropped form the bed, "I don't think that's what I forgot, but it will do I guess." She relented as Naruto crawled onto the bed a mischievous grin on his lips as he scooped a bit of icing out with his hand and began to spread it onto Sakura chest.

He leaned down to lick it off when Sakura stopped him with a hand on his forehead.

"Naruto, turn the light off first!" Sakura commanded a bright blush staining her cheeks.

Naruto stopped and pouted "but Sakura-Chan! It's not like anyone will see us!"

Sakura frowned and looked down, "I know, it's just… I'm shy okay?!" She tried to hide her blush.

Naruto grinned, "I wouldn't think you shy from what we did earlier."

Sakura glared at him, "just turn off the damn light!"

Naruto laughed and grabbed Sakura's chin with his icing covered hand and leaned in to kiss her. "You're so cute!" He gushed as he pulled her into a passionate kiss and turned off the light with his other hand while not breaking the kiss.

Neither of them noticed the ghostly telescope just outside the window as they were a little preoccupied with their activities.

"Oooh hehehe, this is good material! You learned from the best didn't you brat?" A ghostly man with long white hair sat on the tree outside the window watching the couple through his ghostly telescope. The man was the toad sage, Jiraiya. He was supposed to be acting as Naruto's guardian angel, but that didn't mean he couldn't research too, did it? Now what should the title of his next book be?

END!!


End file.
